"Tony Seton's Divorce -- Collaborative Style video is an ideal tool to bring an introductory understanding of collaborative law to the general public. Every collaborative law group should have at least one copy in their educational inventory."
-- Stu Webb, Founder of Collaborative Law
Divorce - - Collaborative Style...outlines the numerous significant benefits of collaboration versus litigation when it comes to dissolving a marriage.
For couples...using the collaborative process means saving lots of money, completing their divorce in weeks instead of years, and, most importantly, protecting themselves, their children, their family and friends from the trauma and carnage of the traditional litigious divorce.
For attorneys...the collaborative process draws on their higher, more creative selves, to design dissolutions that work best for the whole family. They also feel much better about themselves and their work when they go home at night.
For judges...the more people who collaborate instead of litigate, the more time and energy the court has to apply in cases that truly need judicial oversight. Collaboration also translates into less grid-lock, as well as a considerable cost-savings in every jurisdiction.
For mental health professionals and financial planners...collaboration results in a much healthier outcome for their clients, for the whole family and their financial future. Clients can rely on the findings of one specialist instead of watching two experts duel for a judge's favor.
Divorce - - Collaborative Style...explains how divorcing couples can learn to conduct themselves fairly and effectively in a post-marital relationship, preserving the financial and emotional resources that otherwise would have been squandered in litigation. the thoughtful, heartfelt observations of the divorcees, attorneys, and judges who have participated in the process illuminate this vital sea change in family law.
Tony Seton has produced a persuasive, well-informed and sophisticated introduction to collaborative family law. His Divorce -- Collaborative Style explains clearly, from the mouths of the judges and lawyers who have been there, why no divorcing spouses should voluntarily allow their divorce proceedings to end up in court.
-- Pauline H. Tesler, collaborative attorney
I think it is completely changing the culture of the conflict. To me the fact that we can go to the collaborative process and empower the people, the litigants, the parties, to make their decisions, to grab control of their future as opposed to come in, say all the bad things they can and hope the judge rules their way. I think this is the front edge of the wave and I predict in ten years this will be the norm.
Court is the last place we should be resolving family conflict. Itís not helpful, it tends to escalate the problems, itís expensive, it puts family into poverty.
Even though most of the practitioners I think are very sincere and are well meaning, and do their utmost to get their clients through it, with the least amount of scaring, bleeding. When you are stuck with the adversarial situation, its impossible to do everything that you can for that client. And I think the collaborative process enables us to do that.
The adversarial process is like a Borate Bomber coming down in the forest fire dropping the load. It kind of puts out the flames that are fanning the highest at that time, but all those around the edges are just smoldering and smoldering and waiting to catch fire again. I think in the collaborative process we try to look down the road a lot further, try to put out all the fires if we can.
Linda L. Seinturier
Family matters don't belong in court. People, who have been making decisions for many, many years, need to continue to make those decisions. They need to rediscover the decision making ability. And that's what the collabor- ative process requires. It requires that the client bring their best selves to the table.
in the collaborative work we are finding that people come out of it saying they took away from it things that they did not ever imagine. they would say all in all it wasnít so bad because itís never good. But they can say it wasnít so bad, they learned something and took away something good.
most parents, almost all parents, want what's best for their children. And our job is to help them put aside the marital discord and start focusing on building a positive relationship around their children.
I maintained my dignity, I wasn't fearful. Of course, I said a few prayers every time I came in here, but I was able to do it. With an element of calmness. I was not fearful. I knew I was walking into a safe environment and that helped tremendously.
Judges do not want to hear feelings expressed, [my wife] has had a chance to express her feelings and it would have been a whole lot more expensive because we would have been sitting in hallways waiting for cases before us to clear the courtroom and we would be paying attorney fees while weíre sitting out in the hallway.
Court is just too harsh. Itís more like mud throwing back and forth and thatís not what I wanted, was to be throwing words and harsh statements back and forth. Court is also not private.
Tony Seton wrote, pro-duced, directed & reported Divorce - - Collaborative Style. An award-winning broadcast journalist who married a family law attorney, he became interested in the collaborative process as a way for his wife to create a healthier practice, and concomitantly, a better life for both of them at home.
The Production Staff
Richard Jett was Director of Photography.
Richard Childs edited the program and created its look.
Greg Mayo provided additional photography.
Jonathon Lee wrote and played the original music.
All of the interviews for Divorce - - Collaborative Style were videotaped in Redding and San Francisco, California. Tony's on-camera footage was taped in Alexandria, Louisiana.
Divorce - - Collaborative Style was produced at ConnectMedia in Mill Valley.
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